The Brown Eyed Dreamer

'Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart.' William Wordsworth


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Life of a Waitress

The funny part about being a waitress is getting
To glimpse the most intimate parts of a person.
I know how much milk you take in your coffee,
How many sugars go into your tea;
If you prefer flavours or just a ‘plain old cuppa’,
If you daintily sip, or hastily slurp.
You pour me life stories as I pour you refills,
And laughter froths over flavoured lattes as
We share a private joke.

And yet; As you leave
You become just another face among a sea of faces,
Another clanging of change; another torn receipt,
Another mumbled thank you and small smile as you go.
Half empty mugs hold your last traces, a final legacy
Only to be swept up and replaced by another face,
One more coffee order.


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Only in Night

I tell myself I’m okay with being alone
And a part of me believes it.

But another part creeps out in the night and
Mourns over the empty, crumpled sheets
That still hold your shape and your scent. It
Cries over the memories of interlocked fingers
And lips held only a breath apart-
So familiar though so far away.

I tell myself I’m okay with being alone
But only if I’m alone
With you.


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Little Monsters

There’s a monster who lives inside our heads;
A tiny demon who feasts on the doubts that
Fall from the tears and
Drip from the blood and
He grows, he grows, he gets louder.

There’s a monster who lives inside our heads;
A little creature who feeds you the lies that
Make the tears fall and
Make the blood drip but
You’ve just got to learn how to fight him.


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The Shortest, Sharpest Lies

‘That’s fine.’ ‘We’re fine.’ ‘I’m fine.’
Two short words slip off the tongue.
A feeble excuse, a weak shield
Fighting off a barrage of questions,
Blocking off a wave of sympathy,
Keeping out the quiet thoughts
That tell us we’re simply hiding.

‘That’s fine.’ ‘We’re fine.’ ‘I’m fine.’
Two short words that spring to mind.
A shady alibi, a little white lie
Whispering into the dark at night,
Chanting into the light of day,
Ignoring the quiet thoughts that know
That we’re not fine at all.


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Old Ways

She’s disappearing again,
I see her cave into her shadow like before.
Sister pretends to understand but
Loses patience in the silence,
Mum and dad speak, but never listen
To hear the whimpers underneath.
But brother strains to find the sound and
Hears it crying from the dark;
He knows, he knows,
But he’ll never say
Until it is too late.


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Bridge

A walk home through the park
Where darkness swallows every stride,
Your hand in mine because you know I get afraid.
Took me to the bridge
To hold me tight and kiss me slowly,
When you stop to ask that lingering question.
‘Is it perfect for you too?’

Yes, the breeze whispers through branches,
Yes, the river murmurs underneath,
But still mouth forms no words.
Look straight into wide, inquisitive eyes,
Nod profusely, please let that be enough,
I swear, I swear more than anything,
It’s perfect for me too.